people are envious of this life I lead...they tell me,and Im speechless...im just running around cold broke and hungry. Loneley on these april morning listening to the pitter patter of the rain as the telvision screen flashes pictures of a national championship I should have given a thought too..my friends keep calling me,seeing that I havent died...its intresting they never did that till I made it clear that I would be homeless for this year,I know they care,its just this nail bed is more comfortable then any pillow ive ever felt at rest with,and all my pillows were stuffed with opiates and stimulats. I have text messages from various wemon,most in texas,some california,arizona and denver...I have emails from a few more in similar states,one over seas,and one on the road about 7 hours west of me...I could wander down town and cop pretty much any lady I see...confidence and good stories.pained artist and a project for women who were born to be housewives...I go down all night,until the sun rise,then I get back at it several more times...i was built to talk,smoke,draw and fuck...and if this sounds pretentious then get your inches up,only jealousy,or a ceartin misunderstanding gets in the way of the things I discuss...the funniest part is ive been celibate for months...when you can have everything in the world why ask for it all at once? missunderstanding on presentation to the universe. I found her..that one...the one who makes you give up it all...even if its not this life I know our souls were once one...I feel it in her presence...like I hadent seen her in years the second i met her...and Im to afraid to call her...to text her...to do anything but sit here and write poetry for her because I cant be next to her...I could but I feel as though its not the right moment...so alone..again,i sit and pick flowers ripping their peddles to the wind...Im crippled with love,so much so her name alone makes my face turn from a blank slate to a glowing thunderous roar complete with lightning bolts and overturned trailor park homes...I cant even get your picture out of my mind. its been there for months now and all I do is sit here and wait...the universe has been kind to me thus far...be my queen of the road,my life,our stars